The future

“Someday…I’m going to be a CEO.”

“Someday…I’ll be surrounded by children.”

“Someday…I will hold political office.”

“Someday…I’ll retire and have lots of Happy Hours.”

 What was your dream? Mine was to be editor of a national magazine. You see how I’ve achieved that (I’m being sarcastic).

Whatever your dream was, chances are you kissed it goodbye when you had your stroke.

Most of us had to change our dreams to other ones. Like, “Someday…I’ll walk.” My mantra, like the David Sedaris book title, is “Me talk pretty some day.”

Once you get over the worst of your stroke, which takes a year or two (stunning in itself), you may wonder, what does my future hold now? It seems like a black hole. Everything seems like a black hole.

You can let yourself fall into gloom and despair…or you can get creative. The list of things you can do has narrowed considerably. Depending on your deficits and how permanent they are (and you really don’t know at this stage), you may be able to go back to office work. Or you may say, to hell with an office! I’m going to…fill in the blank.  

The point is, you do have a future. Just not the one you imagined. Maybe you loved dance, for instance. You’re not going to be a prima ballerina, but you can manage a dance troupe. Sew costumes. Be a choreographer.

You’re not going to be a CEO (you need physical magnetism and physical perfection to do that.) But you can be a CEO’s personal assistant. You can sit on the board of a large corporation and be part of the decision-making process.

Even retirement can be wonderful. You may have to eschew a drink with a little umbrella, but you can still bask in the sun beside a pool. Sipping lemonade.

Your life has just radically changed direction, and you need to change direction, too. It’s not giving up on your dreams, per se, it’s altering them. Unless you are very ambitious, this may actually come as something of a relief. Oh, I don’t have to work so hard, be so cutthroat. No, you don’t.

I now think of my stroke as a blessing in disguise. I finally stopped being a gerbil, running ‘round and ‘round on that little wheel. I type slowly, it’s true, but that didn’t stop me from writing a book. I greatly enjoy writing, but I’d never written a book before. I did something new with the skills I still had.

What does your future look like?